Guest Blogger: Slacker Mom
While researching the Web for ideas when traveling with challenging children, I came across the Blog Slacker-moms-r-us. At first I was not sure of the title. But it turns out Slacker Mom is one of us: "I'm not a lazy parent but I do my best to not sweat the small stuff. Raising children with neurobehavioral issues gives me plenty to keep me on my toes. Falling into the perfect parenting trap leaves me feeling like a failure because my parenting issues are often not the 'norm'."
We are taking the kids on a vacation and we leave tomorrow. My hubby got a two bedroom condo because he's hoping for a sexcation. We are flying. Madeline is afraid of flying. We flew last summer and she got a little anxious. Her anxiety and tics have greatly reduced since then so we decided to fly again. She was okay with it until tonight. The excitement of our vacation is stressing her out. She currently has a coughing tic. My hubby didn't realize it was a tic and made a comment to her about needing medicine. Drawing attention to her tics causes her to tic more. Especially under times of stress. It didn't help that she saw the weather prediction of storms tomorrow. She flipped out, coughing uncontrollably until she threw up. She panicked, cried that she won't get on the plane if it storms. It kills me to see her so fearful. I felt so helpless.
I gave her Benadryl and had her lie in my bed with a movie. I asked her questions about the movie to help take her mind off her fear that the plane is going to crash. She continued to cough and puke. Trying to reason with a child who is having a panic attack is not easy. She was a little comforted by squeezing my hand. I suggested that when she has these worries she can squeeze my hand and all her worries will travel to me so I can do the worrying for her. She seemed to like that idea. With the Benadryl kicking in and some deep breathing she coughed less. I acted silly and we laughed a little bit before she finally passed out. Then I went in the bathroom and cried.
It's so sad to see her have these worries and difficulties at such a young age. Even though I have moments of not coping I firmly believe God only gives you what you can handle. I can handle this. I don't want to have to handle it but it is what it is. All those years of providing therapy and support to my mother were preparation for this.
We are going to do our best to have a stress free morning since Madeline feeds off our stress. I'm going to give her Benadryl before the flight and pray she doesn't have a coughing fit panic attack on the plane. I know she will feel so much better about it if the flight is smooth. I've noticed that her fear of things is the worst when she's preparing to do something scary. Once she's doing it she's fine. It's the damn worrying that's getting to her. She's done a great job of pushing through her fears. She's afraid of elevators but will get on them. Last year she was terrified of amusement park rides and this year we can't keep her off of them. I'm proud of her for trying the things she is afraid of. They are never as scary as she imagines them to be.
Slacker Mom's bio:
"I'm a self professed slacker mom. I drive my kids to school in my pj's, I can make a couple of Happy Meals from the floor of my car, my kids eat in front of the television, and I believe a dirty house helps kids have a healthy immune system. If you can relate then this blog is for you. No sugar coating on my blog. Let's get real about being a mommy, wife, sister,and friend."
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