Holiday Q & A
Q: Every year my family falls short of giving me a thoughtful present. It hurts my feelings about how little time they spend on my gift while I devote time, energy and money on theirs. I'm not asking for anything expensive. How can I get my family to honor me?
From Parent Coach and A Wild Ride creator/author Mary Scribner:
A: You obviously are very generous and put considerable effort into choosing just the right gift for your family. If this act gives meaning to you then that is great. If not you may want to re-evaluate your approach. Your family may not have a clue when it comes to a gift that would be meaningful to you. Why not give them some hints (list) of what you would like. They may really appreciate knowing rather than guessing (and coming up wrong!)
It sounds like you may have some expectations here that are not being met. Be careful. Expectations are the gateway to disappointment. What you may really need is to feel acknowledged and appreciated. Everyone needs that. Perhaps you could begin by writing down 5 things you appreciate about yourself everyday. Keep adding to the list and think about how good it feels to honor yourself.
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Comments
Elizabeth,
Thanks for coming over to Tales of a Single Parent and leaving a comment. Your blog is GREAT!!!
I wanted to add my two cents. In addition to her learning to honor herself. It is also important that she verbalize how she feels to her family. Maybe they are unaware of how hurt her feelings are and by talking to them, that could help them to understand where she is coming from. Communication goes a long way.
Posted by: Naomi | December 17, 2007 8:37 PM