« April 2008 | Main | June 2008 »
...but just barely. Life is a little overwhelming at the moment. But I promise to return to blogging as soon as I am able (not as soon as it calms down because then will never happen.)
Please return soon to the A Wild Ride Blog. In the meantime, enjoy all the great information and stories on the A Wild Ride Web site.
Cheers, Elizabeth
Photo by Mary Pohlmann
Recently Paul Nyhan, Seattle P-I Reporter, wrote "Parents are Autism's Hidden Victims."
In his article Paul listed several national resources including:
Autism Speaks
and the Autism Society of America.
Check out both sites for amazing resources.
Your autistic child screams. His screams pierce eardrums and walls. Your neighbors shake their heads and shun you. They call the police and you suffer daily from an "overwhelming sense of powerlessness." Your own health suffers. If you are a parent of an autistic child, you know the feeling.
Recently Paul Nyhan, Seattle P-I Reporter, wrote "Parents are Autism's Hidden Victims." In the article, Paul recognized the plight of the parent with empathy and resources, unlike any other article I have read recently. As one of the members in my support group says "he gets it."
"Children have autism, but parents are often invisible casualties. Their child's disorder ricochets through their lives, breaking up marriages, draining bank accounts and robbing them of sleep. University of Washington researchers found these parents, among all with disabled children, suffer the highest levels of depression and anxiety symptoms, and parenting stress."
Paul's article goes on to cite work at the University of Washington Autism Center.
My life is full right now (translation: I am overwhelmed) but I promise that over the next week, I'll share more resources for parents with autistic children. In the meantime, read Paul's article for reassurance that you are not alone!!
From Mary: This came into my inbox; something parents who are dealing with Autism should know about.
If you or someone you know has recently had a family member diagnosed with Autism, you might find this useful. The advocacy group Autism Speaks just launched a program to get support kits tailored with local information to families with a recent diagnosis of Autism. You can read more about their new 100 Day Kit here.
Visit Autism Speaks for more information.
Unfortunately for some of us, Mother's Day is a difficult and anxious day. If you are like many mothers of special needs children, you may need some tips to help manage that stress and anxiety. Here are four favorites:
1. Let others know you're feeling overwhelmed and tell them how they can help.
2. Remember to breathe. A few slow deep breaths can do wonders.
3. Use and welcome humor. A good laugh can go a long way.
4. Don't underestimate the value of rest and sleep. When stressed, your body needs time
to recover.
From the Anxiety Disorders Association of America:
Photo by Mary Pohlmann.
Reprinted from the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry:
Kids are naturally curious and have questions about mental illnesses. Understanding mental illnesses can be challenging for adults as well as for children. Myths, confusion, and misinformation about mental illnesses cause anxiety, create stereotypes, and continue stigma. During the past 50 years, great advances have been made in the areas of diagnosis and treatment of mental illnesses. Parents can help children understand that these are real illnesses that can be treated.
In order for parents to talk with a child about mental illnesses, they must be knowledgeable and reasonably comfortable with the subject. Some parents may have to do a little homework to be better informed. Parents should have a basic understanding and answers to questions such as, what are mental illnesses, who gets them, what causes them, how are diagnoses made, and what treatments are available.
When explaining to a child about how a mental illness affects a person, it may be helpful to make a comparison to a physical illness. For example, many people get sick with a cold or the flu, but only a few get really sick with something serious like pneumonia. People who have a cold are usually able to do their normal activities. However, if they get pneumonia, they will have to take medicine and may have to go to the hospital. Similarly, feelings of sadness, anxiety, worry, irritability, or sleep problems are common for most people. However, when these feelings get very intense, last for a long period of time and begin to interfere with school, work, and relationships, it may be a sign of a mental illness.
Parents should be aware of their child's needs, concerns, knowledge, and experience with mental illnesses. When talking about mental illnesses, parents should:
* communicate in a straightforward manner
* communicate at a level that is appropriate to a child's age and development level
* have the discussion when the child feels safe and comfortable
* watch their child's reaction during the discussion
* slow down or back up if the child becomes confused or looks upset.
Considering these points will help any child to be more relaxed and understand more of the conversation.
Pre-School Age Children
Young children need less information and fewer details because of their more limited ability to understand. Preschool children focus primarily on things they can see, for example, they may have questions about a person who has an unusual physical appearance, or is behaving strangely. They would also be very aware of people who are crying and obviously sad, or yelling and angry.
School-age children
Older children may want more specifics. They may ask more questions, especially about friends or family with emotional or behavioral problems. Their concerns and questions are usually very straightforward. "Why is that person crying? Why does Daddy drink and get so mad? Why is that person talking to herself?" They may worry about their safety or the safety of their family and friends. It is important to answer their questions directly and honestly and to reassure them about their concerns and feelings.
Teenagers
Teenagers are generally capable of handling much more information and asking more specific and difficult questions. Teenagers often talk more openly with their friends and peers than with their parents. As a result, some teens may have already have misinformation about mental illnesses. Teenagers respond more positively to an open dialogue which includes give and take. They are not as open or responsive when a conversation feels one-sided or like a lecture.
Talking to children about mental illnesses can be an opportunity for parents to provide their children with information, support, and guidance. Learning about mental illnesses can lead to improved recognition, earlier treatment, greater understanding and compassion, as well as decreased stigma.
May is Mental Health Month. The National Federation of Families for Children’s Mental Health again declares the first full week in May, May 4-10, 2008, as National Children’s Mental Health Awareness Week.
At A Wild Ride, we want you to know that:
1. Mental Health is essential to overall health and well being.
2. Serious emotional and mental health disorders in children and youth are real and treatable.
3. Children and youth with mental health challenges and their families deserve access to services and supports that are family driven, youth guided and culturally appropriate.
4. Stigma associated with mental illness should no longer exist.
For more information, visit American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry.
With summer vacation just a few short months away, you daydream of sipping lemonade on the patio while watching your kids play joyfully in the summer sun. But then reality settles over you like a wet blanket. You recall last year when by lunchtime on the first day of summer break, you had already heard the dreaded, “I’m bored” several times. And within the first week, you were well on your way to the mental exhaustion that comes from trying to balance your child’s days without the welcomed break that school brings.
While many children thrive on the freedom of unplanned days, this simply isn’t the case for the challenging child. Children with behavioral challenges need structure, regardless of the time of year. Summer can be a frustrating time of year for parents of difficult children. You may wish you could just let your child be, let him enjoy the freedom that summer brings. But you know from past experience, that even your child’s free time must be planned. With just a few months before summer vacation begins, you still have time to plan for a fun and even relaxing summer. There’s no time like the present to gather your resources and begin preparing for a summer to remember.
Personal Resources; Family and friends can be immensely helpful in planning for and executing a summer vacation plan. Setting up regular play dates is one way of taking care of your child’s needs while taking care of your own too. While your friend watches your child at play, you can go for a drive in the country or just enjoy being at home reading a book. With school still in session, now is the time to think about how to continue the friendships your child developed during the school year by exchanging phone numbers with parents. Invite the child’s parent to coffee so you can talk about how to support each other during the sometimes trying months of summer. It may feel awkward at first, but rest assured that every mother (and father) wants and needs support. If you are lucky enough to have family members who understand your child, enlist their support. And don’t forget about younger members of the family, such as older cousins, when you ask for help.
Community Resources: The end of the school year is a hectic time for teachers, so make an appointment to talk with them now. Ask about activities your child could participate in during the summer. Though many schools are no longer providing summer school, teachers and therapists are often bombarded with information about summer activities that are available to their students. The most obvious resource is your child’s classroom teacher, but don’t forget about his speech therapist, occupational therapist, or physical therapist. The P.E. teacher and school librarian may also have ideas for you. Next, check with your city parks department- they often have lists of summer activities and camps. Your public library is another great resource for information. If your child is involved with any therapy or services outside of school, inquire with them as well. Colleges and universities often have a list of students who need credits for time spent working with children- the time may have to be used in a specific way, but it is worth checking into.
Resources Outside of Your Community: If you are considering sending your child to summer camp this year, the American Camp Association (ACA) is a fabulous resource. Collaborating with such organizations as the American Red Cross and the American Academy of Pediatrics, ACA’s website is a database for all types of camps from Boy Scouts and Camp Fire to specialty camps such as chef camp and performing arts camp. Also included on the site are camps supported by religious organizations. But the website is not just a place to find a specific camp. It is also full of advice on finding the right camp for your child and has tips on preparing your child and yourself for the camp experience. And if your child isn’t ready for spending the night away from you, the site also lists day camps. By simply typing in your state or zip code, you can find out about camps near you.
Taking Care of Your Best Resource – You!
Don’t forget to figure yourself into your summer plan. Scheduling regular date nights with your partner ensures that you won’t lose track of each other amid the activity involved with caring for your child. Treat yourself to a regular massage, pedicure, or facial. Speak with a counselor if you need to talk to someone outside of family and friends. Take care of your physical body by eating right and getting regular exercise. Plan to spend time with other adults through support groups, or by simply having lunch with a friend. Take care of your spiritual needs through formal gatherings or quiet meditation. Remember, you can best take care of your child and your family when you first take care of yourself.
By using the next month to gather information, you can begin to put together a summer plan that works for you and your child. With a little planning, you can make this a summer to remember…for all the right reasons!
