A Wild Ride: Our Blog

Unfortunately for some of us, Mother's Day is a difficult and anxious day. If you are like many mothers of special needs children, you may need some tips to help manage that stress and anxiety. Here are four favorites:

1. Let others know you're feeling overwhelmed and tell them how they can help.
2. Remember to breathe. A few slow deep breaths can do wonders.
3. Use and welcome humor. A good laugh can go a long way.
4. Don't underestimate the value of rest and sleep. When stressed, your body needs time
to recover.

From the Anxiety Disorders Association of America:

Photo by Mary Pohlmann.

Posted by Elizabeth at 4:22 AM in Strategies | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Seattle P-I reporter Paul Nyhan wrote an excellent piece titled The Rise in childhood mental illness is perplexing. The article appeared in the Friday, March 7th edition of the paper and featured A Wild Ride and one of our stories.

In the article, Paul wrote:

Childhood mental illness is a complicated, confusing and difficult challenge that should be handled by trained medical professionals. Experts advise parents to follow these guidelines in observing their children:

1. Watch for anxiety. It can be an early sign of depression.
2. Talk to your kids. They often will tell you how they are doing.
3. Eat dinner together.
4. Trust your gut instincts about your own child.
5. Share concerns with your pediatrician.
6. Learn what you can about a diagnosed disorder.
7. Take care of yourself.

In addition to A Wild Ride, other resources cited in the article include the National Alliance on Mental Illness and the New York University Child Study Center. Read NYU's recent article on Depression in Children and Teens.

Wishing our readers all the best resources,

Elizabeth & Mary

Posted by Elizabeth at 1:26 AM in Strategies | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Picture this; you're picking up toys, with a meal on the stove, laundry in the washer, and the kids running wild. The telephone rings and as you attempt to answer it, there is a knock on the door and a crash in another room. You try to handle everything at once, and it blows up in your face. By the time you get to open the door, you look and feel like a raving lunatic.

Believe it or not, it happens to everyone. It can be maddening, and it is only human nature to get frustrated and angry.

The important thing is that you take a step back and a deep breath. Everyone has bad days, however it is important that you recognize what you are feeling and take a time out.

Yes, I said take a time out. Children are not the only ones who need time outs. When the stress of the day is getting to you, and you feel like you are going to snap, go to another room, close the door and take a deep breath.

Taking a time out will not only give you time to regroup and get your senses back on track, it will also give you time to think of ways to avoid the situation again. Taking ten minutes for yourself is therapeutic. If you feel you need more time to regroup, go for a walk around the block. It is good exercise and the kids get some energy out.

When you give yourself a time out, use the time wisely. Think of the situation that caused you to get to the point you are at. More often then not, you will eventually find humor in the whole situation and be able to restore your sense of harmony.

Kids will be kids. They will always be rambunctious and full of energy. They are very intuitive and know just what buttons to push to get a reaction. No matter what situation, try not to overreact, if you feel yourself slipping, walk away and handle whatever the situation is when you have had a chance to settle yourself. That is one of the great things about time outs.

In today's economy, it is often necessary for both parents to work. This, in addition to all of the responsibilities of taking care of a home and family can lead to an extended day and lack of sleep. It is very easy to become overtired, frustrated and just drained from stress. Taking a time out will show your children that you discipline yourself as well as them and that time outs can be given to anyone.

Kelly is the mother of 3 children, 2 of which have severe difficulties. She lives in the New England region of US and is a work- at-home mom for 5 years.

Posted by Elizabeth at 6:00 AM in Strategies | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Does your child have:
• Eyestrain
• Headaches
• Blurred vision
• Double vision
• Sleepiness (while reading)
• Difficulty concentrating on reading material
• Loss of comprehension over time
• A pulling sensation around the eyes
• Movement of print, or words appearing to move, jump, swim or appear to float on the page
• Nausea
• Dizziness
• Car-sickness
• Difficulty focusing far to near
• Sensitivity to light
• Closing one eye and /or rubbing eyes
• Moving closer to the reading material
• Excessive tearing with sustained near work
• Reading slowly
• Having to re-read when reading
• Avoidance of reading or other near work
• Blurred vision worse after reading or other close work
• Excessive head movement when reading
• Frequent loss of place when reading
• Omission of words when reading
• Skipping lines when reading
• Difficulty copying from chalkboard
• Eyes tire easily
• Short attention span (children with ADHD or ADD are 3x more likely to have an eye teaming or focusing issue)

If so, then I am sure it comes as no surprise that one or more of these problems plays an important role in your child's learning.

Pediatric Occupational Therapist Catherine Whiting shared this information with us:

'Many of these vision problems interfere with the children's abilities to reach their potential in school. It is clear that all school-age children should have comprehensive eye and vision examinations, before entering the first grade and periodically thereafter. An estimated 60% of children in occupational therapy have vision problems, due to their issues of ADHD, Autism, sensory integration, prematurity, hypotonia, etc. Intervention will result in faster progress if vision issues are addressed. That is why I personally am recommending this information to all my OT families."

Catherine recently attend a multi-day workshop by Dr. Mitchell Scheiman, an expert in Vision Therapy. She is sponsoring an upcoming seminar on Bainbridge Island (an easy ferry ride from Seattle/Edmonds or a pleasant drive around the Penisula from Tacoma).

On Saturday, December 8th from 10 a.m. to 11 a.m., Melissa Rice, OD, FAAO, pediatric optometrist, will present more information on this topic. Both Catherine and Melissa will be available for questions afterward. The presentation will take place at Catherine Whiting's home (13881 John Street NE). RSVP by email to Catherine or call: 206- 855-7996.

Adults only, please.

Posted by Elizabeth at 1:31 AM in Strategies | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

Personally I would NEVER (did I say that strongly enough?) go to the Mall with my challenging child. Of course, mall shopping is not one of my favorite things to do either. When you combine a sensory challenged child with a cranky parent, well, let’s just say the two don’t mix.

However, I am aware that shopping with our children is sometimes a necessity during the holidays. So, for those of you who must take the little darlings, here are several suggestions from Terri Mauro at About.com: Parenting Special Needs.

1. Set a time limit: Figure out how long your child can control her behavior in the noisy, active, distracting environment of a shopping mall. Subtract 10 minutes.

2. Make a plan: Figure out what you can reasonably do within the time limit you've set. Be realistic.

3. Pack supplies: If you have a bag of tricks for your child, make sure it's in your purse or pack

4. Bring a friend: Don't shop with your kids and no other adult support.

5. Have an escape route. (Do you really need an explanation for this one?)

For more details, read Terri's article Before You Go to the Mall with Your Child.

Do you have shopping strategies? Share them in the comment section or send me an e-mail.

Photo © Radu Razvan - Fotolia.com

Posted by Elizabeth at 3:23 AM in Strategies | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBacks (0)

Earlier this month, I wrote a piece titled Bedtime reading - Soothing Anxieties. At the end of the Blog entry, I asked readers for some other strategies to share with our readers.

Our first contribution is from Cathy at Domestic Psychology who writes:

When my child was getting SI therapy, we did twice daily brushings with a soft vegetable-type brush. That morphed into just his back being brushed and I eventually ditched the brush in favor of my fingernails. I was able to calm him down and lull him to sleep with one of my "back scratches". He's 17 now, but he still asks for a back scratch occasionally.

We have made his bedroom into a comfort zone. The walls and ceiling are dark blue and the bed is covered with squishy things to squeeze or throw. The ceiling glows softly when the lights first go out.

Since we have now officially entered the STRESS season, we are looking for other calming or soothing strategies that proved successful for you and your child. Please comment below or send to me via e-mail.

Posted by Elizabeth at 4:24 AM in Strategies | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Facts about your “sleeping” child:

• After a child falls asleep for the night, she doesn't always stay that way. Parents reported that 71 percent of infants wake up needing help or attention. As a child gets older, her tendency to wake up at night diminishes; just 46 percent of toddlers, 36 percent of preschoolers and 14 percent of school-age children wake up during the night.

• More than half of all preschoolers stall about going to bed at least a few nights a week. They resist going to bed at bedtime, according to 30 percent of responses, seem sleepy or overtired during the day (26 percent), and/or have difficulty waking up in the morning (19 percent).

• Most parents (76 percent) said they would like to change something about the way their child sleeps, whether it be the time the child goes to sleep, his or her bedtime behavior, when the child wakes up, how well or how long the child sleeps, or how well he or she naps.

• Almost all (90 percent-96 percent) of parents reported that their child has a usual bedtime routine. Reading most frequently is part of the ritual, and kids who get more sleep are more likely to have books incorporated into their routine. Tooth brushing, taking baths or showers, watching TV, saying prayers and feeding are the other most-mentioned habits.

• Slightly more than one-half of infants typically are put in their crib or bed when they already are asleep, compared to about one-fourth of younger toddlers and 16 percent of older toddlers.

Reprinted from Game plan for bedtime by Brianna Horan for the Pittsburgh Tribune Review.

Posted by Elizabeth at 5:48 AM in Strategies | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Here are some sleep tips from Karen. To read her story, go to Overnight Success.

Counting sheep is a strategy that did not work for Joshua. But with trial and error, we did find success. Children with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), and children with other disabilities often don’t possess the skills needed to put themselves to sleep. They need to be taught these skills and you are your child’s very best teacher. Use one or all of the ideas below. Adapt them for your child. Before you know it, your little bundle of energy will be getting a good nights sleep and you will be getting a much needed break.

Bedtime Routine

Every child thrives when a routine is established. Routine is the foundation on which a good sleep can be built. Your routine might include reading a book, saying a prayer, tucking in a special stuffed animal or singing a goodnight song. Whatever you decide on, stick to it for at least a month before changing it. After all, a routine can’t be a routine unless it’s…routine.

Bread and Water

Limit snacks before bedtime. When we eat before bed, our body gets the message that it needs to stay awake. If your child is often hungry before bed, establish a time an hour before bedtime when he can have a snack. Limit the amount and of course stay away from sugar. If he’s thirsty, stick with water.

A Symphony of Sleep

If you are pretty sure your child would fall asleep if he’d just stay in his bed, make him a deal. Turn on a CD of soft instrumental music. Tell him that when the CD is done, then and only then, he can come and get you. Chances are that while listening to a 45-minute CD, he’ll be lulled to sleep. If he’s not, experiment with it. Change to a different composer, or a different instrument. Try a CD with nature-sounds, or you might even try a book-on-tape.

Think Journal

If your child can’t get to sleep because he is worrying or can’t stop thinking about something, start a journal for him. While he is lying in bed, ask him to tell you three things he is thinking about. Write them down in the Think Journal. Before you leave the room, remind him that those things are already written down, so you can talk about them in the morning. Sometimes that’s all a child will need. Knowing that his worries are written down, frees his mind and he will soon drift off to sleep.

Technology Turn-off

Establish a time an hour before his bedtime that is technology-free. That means no television, computer or video games. He can read, play a board game, play with toys or enjoy any other activity that doesn’t involve a screen. This technology-free time will limit the amount of stimulation he is receiving before bedtime.

Sleep Rewards

Sleep habits take time to establish. But once he is used to the routine, getting to sleep will become easier and easier. And just as important is the effect on you as the parent. When you are able to get an hour or two of alone-time in the evenings, you will be better able to cope with the next day’s challenges. It may take a little work and a lot of persistence now, but the long-term reward for both of you…is enormous.

Posted by Elizabeth at 5:35 AM in Strategies | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)